Nah, I’m Good Off That
Last year I took the same Alexis from 2014 into 2015 and have had one of the best years of my life. I think the key was always being myself. I was met with a lot, and I mean a lot, of circumstances that tested me on whether or not I should stay true to me or become what everyone else thought I should be. There’s pressure out there from everyone and everywhere to lose your morals, lose your faith, give up, and/or change your dream.
This year I focused on me. I didn’t pay attention to what anyone else was doing in their lane. I honest to God don’t even care. I came to the realization that, as people being the sinful and jealous beings that we are, there will always be more people trying to bring you down than to uplift you and move you forward. I developed myself as a force to be reckoned with on my own. Every goal I set for myself in 2015 I accomplished and then some, through the grace of God, love of family, and confidence in myself. Don’t let that boy tell you you’re not good enough. Don’t let that girl tell you’ll never be on her level. Don’t let that school tell you you’re not smart enough, or that job tell you you’re unqualified. You are perfect. You have always been perfect in all your imperfection.
I’d say that’s the best lesson I learned this year. I strive for perfection. I always have and always will, but in striving for perfection I never once realized that it was an impossible task. I thought, “Well, everyone else makes mistakes, but not Alexis.” Every time I did something I felt was wrong I punished myself. It would become an obsession in my thoughts, and I’d scramble to find some way or answer to make it right again. I can’t tell you how much time and energy I spent chasing after things I didn’t want just because I felt this unrelenting need to just make my mistake right. In 2015 I realized that perfection is fine to reach for, you actually should always reach for perfection, but with the understanding that you will eventually fall short. I work very hard because I have big dreams and big goals and if I don’t work hard I will never reach them. With a mindset like this you don’t often make a lot of mistakes. If you are someone like me then this message is for you! When you don’t often make mistakes it’s easy to think you just may be the exception to the rule, but you’re not. And it’s easy to believe that when you do make mistakes it’s the end of the world, but it isn’t. As long as you’ve done your best that’s all you can ask for. More likely than not your best will be good enough, but when it’s not THAT’S OKAY TOO.!
This year I became comfortable and accepting of my own imperfections. I’m weird. I’m not sexy. It’s just not in my personality. I won’t ever have a lot of Instagram, Twitter, or Snapchat followers, it’s just not of extreme importance, but that does not make my worth any less than anyone else. I speak my mind. I live every day and do everything with a purpose, and the will of God behind me. I make mistakes sometimes and I don’t need to spend my whole life trying to fix them. I can just accept them as something I would have done differently, but am able to move forward having learned. Most importantly, I am perfect exactly as I am. I don’t need a bigger butt or bigger boobs, a smaller waist, a prettier face. I am what God has made me and I am perfect in his image. I am smart, and I have potential to make a difference as exactly who I am. My resolution for 2016 is to continue striving for greatness and excellence. To continue to recognize and work on my failures and better myself as a human being with every step I take, and most of all, continue to just Be Me.